Saturday, 31 May 2008

Watched recently

The Late Show: Barbara Walters, Penn & Teller and Cobie Smulders - Penn & Teller were OK, but I worked out how they did their act, something I seem to be able to do with inceasing ease with all magic acts lately. Cobie Smulders briefly reminded me of Lake Bell - 3/5

Nip/Tuck: Magda and Jeff - a bit silly, really. Seen worse episodes though and it's always good to see AnnaLynne McCord (below) - 3/5



Britain's Got Talent: 29th May - 3/5
James Stone - when the camera cut to his family, I'm pretty sure that Alicia Eyo, who played Denny in Bad Girls, was among them - 3/5
Charlie Wernham - 3/5
Harlequins - 3/5
Andrew Muir - I do appreciate why the judges put him through, because he does have a good voice, but why didn't he go for the X Factor instead? - 3/5
Boogie Babes - there's something alarming about a bunch of 8 to 12-year olds dacing in shiny black latex leggings. They were good though - 4/5
Vizage - really woman, when Simon Cowell tells you you can't sing, you're not going to do yourself any favours by coming back and singing again - 2/5
Jeremy Lynch - should have gone through. I don't buy into the argument that his dropping the ball was like a singer dropping notes because what he did required a much high level of skill and precision, so such errors should be more forgiveable - 4/5
Faryl Smith - my personal stand-out act of the series so far - 5/5

The Big Bang Theory: The Pork Chop Indeterminacy - aka The Shiksa Indeterminacy on the Sky EPG. No idea where E4 keep getting these alternate titles from. Courtney Henggeler is an interesting and attractive newcomer to the small screen - 4/5

Britain's Got Talent: 30th May - 3/5
Caburlesque - seemed to be less dancing, more running to a new position and striking a pose - 2/5
Madonna Decena - a sob story will only get you so far - 2/5
Anya Sparks - I love the fact that we a live in a country where a big, ordinary woman like Anya can find herself on TV in front of an audience of 10 million people - 3/5
Craig Harper - only one of his impressions was anywhere near convincing, but he's amusing enough - 3/5
Diva Las Vegas - 2/5
Nemisis - street dancing lost out earlier in the week when they put through the Cheeky Monkeys ahead of the far superior Flava, but it's won out this week with Nemisis and quite right too because they were exceptional - 5/5
Per Diem - that singer looked like a right nasty piece of work when he'd been buzzed out - 2/5
Esacla - four fit women in tight dresses playing a James Bond theme on electric string instruments. What's not to like? - 5/5

Thursday, 29 May 2008

Watched recently

Britain's Next Top Model: 19th May - OK, what the fuck is going on? Lynsey clearly had the best photo of the whole shoot and got complimented on it by all the judges, yet she got kicked out. What the fuck are the criteria here? - 3/5

The Apprentice: Week Ten - finally, Sophocles gets the boot, and well deserved it is too. Phew for Helene, rocket up the arse there girl. She doesn't stand a chance though - 5/5

Britain's Got Talent: 28th May - 3/5
Mandy Ellen Dancers - 3/5
Iona - kudos for performing with a big fat lip - 4/5
Cheeky Monkeys - good, but they shouldn't have gone through - 4/5
Kay & Harvey - not really that good, but there was something lovely about that old guy on the keyboard getting his few minutes of fame - 3/5
Bang On! - 3/5
Flava - really good, best act of the night in fact - 4/5
Sauris Nandi - he might be a good surgeon, but his act was shit. The girl was blatantly in the stand - 1/5
Andrew Johnston - went through, good choice - 4/5

Battlestar Galactica: Guess What's Coming To Dinner? - JUUUUUUUMP! - 5/5

Britain's Got Talent: 28th May - 3/5
Irresistible - 4/5
Strike - 4/5
Mary Halford March - 3/5
The Deans Of Magic - ugh, I felt embarassed for them, but they deserved the criticism for a dull act. Claudine does have a good body though. I thought they were supposed to make a big deal of their sensuality? She spent most of the act off-stage - 2/5
Charlie Green - 2/5
Urban Gypsies - 3/5
Hoop La La - 4/5
George Sampson - very good indeed, especially the water finale, clearly put everything into his performance and a most deserved finalist - 5/5

Terminator: The Shirley Manson Chronicles



Unexpected news of the day: hot Garbage singer Shirley Manson is making her acting debut in the next season of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, in a recurring role as the CEO of a high-tech company.

Tuesday, 27 May 2008

Watched yesterday

Lost: Cabin Fever - move the island?! Fantastic! - 4/5

Mad Men: Nixon vs Kennedy: "a man is whatever room he's in". My new mantra - 4/5

Britain's Got Talent: 26th May - 4/5
Boogie Wonderland - dancers looked hot when they were dancing, but not so when they stood still. Nothing special in the routine - 3/5
Kate & Gin - fantastically well-trained dog, but I feel a bit sad when I think how well they get on because one day Kate will be heartbroken. Still, hopefully that's a good few years away yet. Well deserved to go through - 5/5
Michael Machell - comedy gold, deliriously insane, albeit crap - 5/5
Dean Wilson - I hate this kind of singer so I'm glad he's gone - 2/5
Sophie Mei - would have been happy if she had gone through - 4/5
Tracy Lee Collins - 3/5
Phil Blackmore - 3/5
Signature - not as good as their audition, but they had the advantage of surprise in that. The turban-wearing guy was totally unexpected and original. Still not a bad routine last night and it will be interesting to see what they come up with for the final. And who doesn't like to watch a fat guy dance? And I'm pretty weighty myself, so I can say that - 4/5

Questions

1. Why is it cheaper to buy orange juice than oranges?

2. Why is it that when you microwave a bowl of baked beans then tip them out onto a plate, there will always be one bean that resolutely clings to the bowl?

Sydney Pollack, 1934-2008



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sydney_Pollack

Monday, 26 May 2008

Notes

1. Danielle Lloyd looking as hot as ever, this time with a Gladiator.

2. Sienna Miller looking veeeeeery sexy in black leather while filming on GI Joe.

3. Apparently, Kate Middleton has never really been called Kate at all. Her name is actually Catherine Middleton and 'Kate' is nothing more than a press invention. Queen Catherine... works for me!

4. The Daily Mail's new look pages are a f*cking mess. Look at the showbiz page. A complete dog's dinner.

Watched yesterday

Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull - somewhat disappointing revival of the Indiana Jones movies. It's been done to death in the media, so I won't go over the plot again. It's not really a bad film, it's just a very average, inconsequential one. There are some silly moments more suited to a kid's film and these sadly outnumber the moments of true inspiration, such as when Indy finds himself on his own in a deserted town a minute away from a nuclear test blast. Harrison Ford is good vale as ever, as is Cate Blanchett's Soviet agent, her dodgy accent more than made up for by the fact she looks hot with his black leather boots and severe haircut! Shia LaBeouf adds nothing but initial exposition, Karen Allen looks like someone who hasn't done any real acting in years and John Hurt says very little beyond the odd cryptic remark. Ray Winstone's fine though. There's a nice touch at the end that hints at another outing, but please G-d, keep George Lucas away from the screenplay - 3/5

Have I Got A Bit More News For You: 17th May - Kirsty Young, as attractive as ever and able to hold her own among the boys. A class act - 4/5

Britain's Got Talent: 24th May - a lacklustre set of final acts, with the exception of the five street dancers. Would be good to see them get through to the semis (which start tonight), but they're perhaps too similar to the bigger group of similar dancers a week or two ago. Looking forward to Star Wars guy! - 3/5

Warship - a rarity for me, watching a documentary series on Five, but this was pretty good. It's a fly-on-the-wall look at HMS Illustrious, flagship of the Royal Navy. Reminded me of ITV's short-lived nautical drama Making Waves, that they unceremoniously pulled from the schedules after a few episodes never to be seen again. Some of those Navy girls are pretty cute... - 4/5

Sunday, 25 May 2008

News of the weird

Watched yesterday

Doctor Who: The Unicorn And The Wasp - inconsequential but mildly entertaining episode with a silly looking giant wasp - 3/5

Incidentally, have you seen the rest of season trailer. She's back, they're back...

Saturday, 24 May 2008

Watched yesterday

Boston Legal: Tabloid Nation - just why is Saffron Burrows in this? She doesn't seem to do anything of significance. She's a great actress and is being wasted. Give her some court time for g-d's sake! - 3/5

Jericho: Reconstruction - first episode of the short-lived second season. It's OK, but doesn't really show any improvement on the first season - 3/5

Derren Brown: Trick Or Treat: Episode 2.3 - 4/5

Pygmalion and An Eligible Man

I went to London on Wednesday to see two plays, Pygmalion at the Old Vic and An Eligible Man at the New End Theatre in Hampstead.

For those who don't know, I'm a sponsor of the Old Vic, so make a point of attending everything they put on. Before the matinee, I met up with Natasha Harris, the Old Vic's newly appointed Depty Director of Development. She has just replaced Tiffany Nesbit, who has returned to the US. We discussed various things, including the possibility of increasing my level of support, changes she's thinking about making to the perks supporters get and the future programme. As I already knew, they're putting on The Winter's Tale and The Cherry Orchard next summer, directed by Sam Mendes as part of the Bridge Project, which takes the same plays and performers to the US. I picked up some gossip about a Hollywood name who looks likely to be cast. While not a really famous actor, they are someone most people with a reasonable interest of movies will have heard of. And no, I'm not giving any clues, but I believe a press release is fairly imminent.

No word on what's filling the schedules after christmas. They announced last week that Alan Ayckbourn's The Norman Conquests is being revived between September and December, so there's no panto this year. Should be an interesting experiment. It's actually a trilogy of plays, starring the same cast, as the same characters, in the same location and at the same time. In effect, each play takes place in different rooms of the same house. Each can be viewed on a standalone basis, of you can watch all three and see the interconnections between them. The cast includes Amelia Bullmore, Jessica Hynes, Stephen Mangan and Paul Ritter and it's directed by the increasingly stellar Matthew Warchus, who recently did Speed-The-Plow. Interestingly, it's being performed in-the-round, necessitating a reconfiguration of the theatre which will leave it dark for about a month after the end of Pygmalion's run, but which will they also be able to roll out again for appropriate productions in the future.

Anyway, on to Pygmalion. It's not a play I'm really familiar with. That said, I'm not really familiar with many plays at all, but never mind. I won't go into the plot here, you can look it up, but in summary it concerns two men who make a bet that one of them (Tim Piggott-Smith as Professor Higgins) can transform a common-as-muck flower seller (Eliza Doolittle, played by Michelle Dockery) into a seemingly well-educated lady.

Being a Wednesday matinee, the audience was almost entirely full of pensioners on coach trips, one of whom, a lady from Wolverhampton, fell asleep next to me within ten minutes of curtain up. Fortunately, the play didn't have such a soporific effect on me. I thought the three pre-interval acts were the most entertaining and humorous, particularly the third where Doolittle is introduced to to Higgins' mother and other society figures. After the interval, it gets a little more serious as the questions are posed of what should happen to Eliza after her transformation, given the bet is over, and what are Higgins' true feelings for her.

Unfortunately, by this time I had been sat in my seat for 90 minutes and as anyone who has sat for any length of time in the Old Vic stalls will tell you, they're not the most comfortable seats in the world. The leg room is fine, generous in fact, but they're very narrow, so you can't alleviate discomfort by crossing your legs and so on. By the end of the play, my low back was suffering and I'm afraid it negatively impacted on my enjoyment of the play.

However, my discomfort couldn't diminish my enjoyment of Michelle Dockery's performance. Quite simply, it's the best female performance I've seen at the Old Vic so far. She's a truly phenomenal Eliza, pitch perfect in every way and if there's any justice in the world, must surely become a great star of stage and screen. Almost as good is Tim Piggott-Smith, clearly having tremendous fun in playing Higgins like an overgrown schoolboy. An absolutely class act.



Also notable are Tony Haygarth as Alfred Doolittle and newcomer Emma Noakes as Clara - a sublime little performance from her.

Overall then, a recommendation. If you feel you can endure the seats, please do go see Pygmalion and you will be rewarded with some fabulous performances.

After Pygmalion, I met up with my good friend Lotty and we headed to Hampstead for An Eligible Man, via a brief diversion to check in at my hotel in Belsize Park. The New End is a tiny little theatre of around 80 seats, handily situated next door to a pub in a quiet corner of Hampstead. It's a converted mortuary, apparently! [Insert gag about corpsing here]. We were here because the play stars an amazing friend of mine, actress Patricia (Tish) Potter...



Tish is best known for her five-year stint as Diane Lloyd in Holby City, before which she was in Brookside. She's also appeared in Extras, Jam & Jerusalem, The Bill and other shows, as well as the film Shakespeare In Love, for which she won a SAG.

An Eligible Man is a about a widowed judge (The Archers' Graham Seed as 'Topher' Osgood), the three women vying for his attention and his daughter (Tish!), who is trying to get him to move on, while still remaining very protective of him. It deals with the subject of moving on after the death of a loved one in a gentle and way with light humour. It's well paced with individual scenes never lasting more than a few minutes and its runtime - two hours including interval - is just right. It does feel like a play written for a middle-aged, Radio 4 audience, but that's not meant as a criticism.

Graham Seed is a seasoned actor and his performance is spot-on, investing his character with a likeable and handsome charm. The rest of the cast are mixed. Sonia Saville stands out as posh Lady Jo, Maggie Hallinan as neighbour Lucille and Malcolm James as Osgood's best friend are fine, if not outstanding, but Grainne Gillis tries too hard and fails to convince as osgood's new tenant, Sally. Tish aside, the only other cast member is Nina Kwok as a chinese shop assistant. She's fine, but the scene is ill-advised and a little embarassing.

As for the lady herself, Tish Potter brings the play's life and energy. The stage almost lights up when she appears, flowing locks, in her cycle helmet, miniskirt and boots, a sort of middle-class post-hippie chick. Hers is the only physical performance in the play and without it, it would risk becoming a staid parlour piece. As it is, she rounds it out beautifully and, indeed, with beauty. I am, of course, biased. You don't have to take my word for it though. Here's what other reviewers have said...

"Patricia Potter gives the outstanding performance of the piece" - Jeremy Austin, The Stage

"an excellent performance by Patricia Potter" - Jeremy Kingston, The Times

"There are stellar performances from Graham Seed... Patrica Potter, who plays Osgood’s troubled daughter" - Northwest Magazine

After that, we waited for Tish at the stage door, along with an older couple who I later learned were family friends of Tish. We all went off to a pub just down the road and the man, Stuart, got a round of drinks in. Turned out he was none other than millionaire Mr Stuart Wheeler, founder of financial spread betting company IG Index, erstwhile Conservative Party donor of no small significance and father of supermodel Jacquetta Wheeler...



He's currently taking Gordon Brown to court to try and force the government to hold a referendum on the Treaty of Lisbon. A thoroughly lovely man he is too. His wife, Tessa, is a successful photographer and is about to have a book published containing her photos of Tangiers.

The Wheelers left and Tish, Lotty and I watched the conclusion of the Champions League Final. I was expected the pub to be packed, but there were about twenty people there tops, including none other than Lisa Stansfield and her noisy dog. We had one last drink and chatted, then went our separate ways!

The next morning, on Tish's recommendation, I headed for Hampstead Heath, Hill Garden and the Pergola. You can find the photos of this expedition here and here, but I'll finish this post with my favourite...

Friday, 23 May 2008

Belated happy birthdays

A belated happy birthday to two of my favourite models, who both advanced a year yesterday.

First off, the model people love to hate, Naomi Campbell (38)...



Secondly, model, author, TV personality, singer, horse-rider, creator of bed linen, mother and all-round capitalist icon Katie Price, aka Jordan (30)...

Watched recently

I'm so behind with all this. Apologies for not going into any depth.

The Colbert Report: 12th May - 4/5

Battlestar Galactica: Faith - 4/5

Nip/Tuck: Rachel Ben Natan - 3/5

The Big Bang Theory: The Nerdvana Annihilation (aka The Hello Kitty Instability, The Nerdmabilia Scattering) - the two aka titles came from the Sky EPG. Whoever thought them up is very clever - 4/5

The Colbert Report: 13th May - 3/5

Entourage: Gary's Desk - 4/5

House: Games - 4/5

ER: Tandem Repeats - 4/5

Heroes: Fight Or Flight - enough with the dodgy green screen already! - 4/5

The Apprentice: Week Nine - Sophocles survives again! FFS! Helene looks hot in jeans, especially when she's standing next to Claire - 4/5

Wednesday, 21 May 2008

The world's tightest pants

Just killing time before I head off to London for a double-bill of plays - Pygmalion at the Old Vic and An Eligible Man at the New End Theatre in Hampstead - and I came across this article in the Mail about Stacey Ferguson's tight pants. I know it's not particularly incisive blogging, but they are seriously tight pants and can't pass unmentioned.

Tuesday, 20 May 2008

Notes

1. Good news in the world of Doctor Who where the BBC have announced that Steven Moffat is to replace Russell T. Davies as executive producer. Moffat is responsible for writing some of the best episodes, including The Girl In The Fireplace and Blink. Davies deserves credit for reviving the series, but the episodes he wrote were almost always the weakest and it is time he moved on. Moffat takes up the reigns in time for the 2010 season - remember, there's no 2009 season.

2. Film recommendation - The Station Agent, 11.35pm tonight on BBC One.

3. The government has apparently abolished Cheshire and Bedfordshire.

4. Good, perceptive articles in the Guardian sticking the boot in Labour from George Monbiot and Polly Toynbee today.

Monday, 19 May 2008

Watched recently

Derren Brown: Trick Or Treat: Episode 2.2 - press the button! Kill the kitten! - 4/5

The Late Show - Gwyneth Paltrow looking wonderful. I think Dave has a shoe fetish - 4/5

Britain's Got Talent - 4/5

Doctor Who: The Doctor's Daughter - one of the season's dafter and more forgettable episodes, though it did give us an interesting character in Jenny, played by Georgia Moffett (daughter of former doctor Peter Davison), who I'm sure we'll see again - 3/4

Lost: Something Nice Back Home - a very dull episode that didn't seem to advance things very far at all. A massive disappointment following the previous episode - 2/5

In Bruges - Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson play a pair of hitmen sent to hide out in Bruges by their boss (Ralph Fiennes) when a job goes wrong. It's an interesting combination of black comedy, drama and tragedy, effortlessly switching gears back and forth between laugh-out-loud one-liners and poigniant pathos. Farrell and Gleeson give good performances, but Fiennes stands out as the sociopathic Harry, almost channeling Ben Kingsley's Don Logan in Sexy Beast and there's a noteworthy role for Peter Dinklage. Top marks for having the guts to give the film an ambiguous ending too - 4/5

The Late Show - Robert Downey Jr was the entertaining main guest, followed by Alicia Keys. We also learned that's it's easier to hail a cab in New York if you're dressed as Iron Man, rather than Spider-Man - 4/5

Mad Men: Indian Summer - 4/5

Britain's Next Top Model: Character and Personality - Alex survived again! Yay! Lauren shouldn't have gone though. I don't think Lisa Snowdon and her chums have a clue what they're doing - 4/5

Admin - BBC Three sitcom pilot setting in and around the admin department of a firm of no win, no fee solicitors. Inevitible comparisons with The Office, but this doesn't have that show's deliberate cringing embarassment, which makes it a much easier watch, though not quite so good. It's very funny though, especially if you've worked in that kind of office environment, and I hope it gets a full series commission. The standout turn belongs to Jessica Hall as Tania, the office assistant who appears to be quite thick, but is actually the sharpest of the lot. Her high ponytail helps, though I have a fetish for those, so that's a somewhat subjective observation. Sian Reeves is surprisingly hot too. Must be the tight skirt - 4/5

Saturday, 17 May 2008

Watched recently

Battlestar Galactica: The Road Less Travelled - 4/5

Nip/Tuck: Duke Collins - AnnaLynne McCord is quite stunning, even if her character is a complete sociopath. Luckily for me, she's joined the cast of 90210, the Beverly Hills 90210 spin-off, as a spoiled rich-bitch, which is just the kind of girl I like - 4/5

Mad Men: The Long Weekend - 4/5

The Big Bang Theory: The Bat Jar Conjecture - 4/5

House: You Don't Want To Know - actually, I do want to know. Does Thirteen have the disease or not? Let's not have this hanging over us for the rest of the season, please. That aside, a top-notch episode - 5/5

10 Items Or Less: The New Boss - a new American sitcom, OK, but nothing worth investing in on an ongoing basis - 3/5

ER: Under Pressure - a tremendous episode which shows just how skillfully they can pull off high tension drama when they have to. Best of the season - 5/5

Heroes: The Kindness Of Strangers - 4/5

Derren Brown: Trick Or Treat: Episode 2.1 - I wonder if that book-reading and recall technique would work for me? I could study my entire degree in the week before the exams! - 4/5

Entourage: The Day Fuckers - strange episode that didn't advance any story-arcs. As is ooften the case, Jeremy Piven steals the show. Lets also give long overdue credit to Perrey Reeves, who plays Ari's long-suffering wife. I have the term, but if ever the term MILF could be applied to someone... - 4/5

Boston Legal: Rescue Me - an improvement over the previous episode with multiple stories involving all the main cast except Christian Clemenson. That said, the stories weren't that great - 4/5

Harry's day!



FA Cup final day today and here's hoping it a good one for Harry Redknapp and Portsmouth. Sure, Cardiff have the romance of the underdog, but there's the undeniable fact that they're a Welsh club and shouldn't be in the FA Cup anyway. This final is more than a club game, it's an international, England V Wales. The nation's pride is at stake!

Besides, who would begrudge Harry a cup win? He's done wonders with the club and is currently the top English manager in football. He deserves a big trophy.

This day dedicated to Harry Dempsey, gone but never forgotten on cup final day...

[UPDATE @ 5.17PM, PORTSMOUTH WIN!!!]

Friday, 16 May 2008

New CSI regular



Following on from the departure of CSI regulars Jorja Fox and Gary Dourdan this past season, a bit of new casting was inevitible, cue Canadian actress Lauren Lee Smith. Here's the CBS press release:

"LOS ANGELES, May 16 - Lauren Lee Smith joins the cast of CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION next season as a series regular.

She will play CSI Bryce Adams, a smart, flirtatious, and witty non-conformist who entered law enforcement to rebel against her judgmental psychiatrist father. She has always been fascinated by the perverse underbelly of society and cannot be shocked or intimidated. She will be hired onto Grissom's night shift team.

Lauren Lee Smith was first discovered out of Vancouver, Canada when she was cast into Showtime's "The L-Word." Lauren then went on co-star in "Art School Confidential" opposite Max Minghella, and received critical praise and attention from her performance in the independent film "Lie with Me." Lauren also co-starred opposite Casey Affleck and Zach Braff in "The Last Kiss," and "Pathology" opposite Michael Weston and Milo Ventimiglia. She will also soon be seen in the horror film "Trick 'r Treat," as well as a lead role opposite Ashley Judd in the film "Helen.""